G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra isn’t G.I. Joe: The Movie

G.I. Joe Rise of Cobra I will not be among the thousands who flock to the theaters on August 7 in order to see G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra. Nor will I be one of the thousands to rent or buy it when it’s released on DVD. I might catch it on one of the movie channels…but that’s if I bother to stop instead of flipping past it.

One of my favorite movies was and still is G.I. Joe: The Movie.

So why won’t I go see G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra? Well, I’m sure it’ll be a great action movie full of funny one liners and lots of things blowing up *yawn*…

The trailer alone has G.I. Joe cliche’ written all over it. I don’t give a flying [bleep] about the rivalry between Snake Eyes and Storm Shadow. What makes Snake Eyes so popular anyways? Oh yeah. He’s a faceless, mute, ninja who comes across as “mysterious” and “moody”. That’s because he can’t speak!!!

At least G.I. Joe: The Movie featured a whole new group of characters instead of focusing on the already popular ones. For the Joe’s it was Jinx, Chuckles,Tunnel Rat and the main hero Falcon. (No, I didn’t forget Big Lobb…poor Big Lobb)

Cobra-LaThen there was the new group of baddies,Cobra-La. Personally, I love Cobra-La and the fact that they’re the main villains in the movie is such a twist. Even if you hate Cobra-La you can’t deny that Nemesis Enforcer was a wickedly cool character and a 100% pure bad-ass.

Here’s the clincher for me as to why I won’t go see G.I. Joe:The Rise of Cobra…no Serpentor! He’s my all time favorite villain! He’s emperor, supreme ruler and without him there is no Cobra.
G.I. Joe Serpentor

I’m changing the title of the new G.I. Joe movie to read G.I. Joe: The Rise of A Hooded Villain and His Minions because…well that’s what it is. Right?

I’m so passionate about G.I. Joe: The Movie that I’ve written a comic book pitch called G.I. Joe: The Return of Cobra-La and would re-introduce Cobra-La back into the comic book series. (Without disrupting the current story line)

Now if they make a sequel to this G.I. Joe movie and Serpentor is in it…well I’ll be the first one in line on opening day. Until then, I’m sticking with G.I. Joe: The Movie and my opinions.

7 Comments on "G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra isn’t G.I. Joe: The Movie"

  1. Jay12bo13 says:

    Even though I myself watched the movie (I just had to, even knowing how cheesy it was going to be), I have to say I agree with you on all parts except one. In G.I. Joe: The Movie, I always considered the creatures of Cobra-La to be the real protagonists, as they were not only one with nature, but in their own words were simply trying to take back a world that was stolen from them. ^_^ I also read your GIJoe pitch and it was pretty damn cool, hope your pitch is successful

  2. Jay12bo13 says:

    Even though I myself watched the movie (I just had to, even knowing how cheesy it was going to be), I have to say I agree with you on all parts except one. In G.I. Joe: The Movie, I always considered the creatures of Cobra-La to be the real protagonists, as they were not only one with nature, but in their own words were simply trying to take back a world that was stolen from them. ^_^ I also read your GIJoe pitch and it was pretty damn cool, hope your pitch is successful

    • Dayka says:

      I did hear of GI Joe. I didn’t get along with him. As far as I know, he’s not a Muslim, but I won’t say anything about catcarher and behavior as backbiting is unlawful to Islam.Peace.Ankaboot: I did answer your question properly. The reason I’m on block is because my views differed from yours and you can’t take any criticism. I don’t care who blocks me. wa’alaykum as-salam.I’ll answer for Dragon. The fact was that you always put down users who don’t say salaam, but you rarely say salaam yourself. When we pointed that out, you put us on block. lol

  3. Sonny Nardone says:

    Thanks for the great article. Now I know…

    • Mikhalis says:

      You make a great point. The great majority of the GOP is not wlhatey. I’ve thought a lot about this lately: the overall culture in America nurtures the super-scintilla-longshot dream of getting rich fast. We produce very little anymore. Our businesses are largely services, whether it’s writing software or whatever, running hotels, running restaurants, consulting consulting consulting, banking and financial horse shit Many businesses are started not with the essentially agrarian idea of building long-term growth and value, but of building little holes that we can convince people are gold mines, and then selling it all as quickly and for as inflated a price as possible (witness the dot-com bubble) Lotteries are pervasive and gambling is spreading Entertainment is huge and kids grow up suffused in that entertainment culture Poor and middle-class folks in the GOP are nurturing the dream that one day they, too, may be wlhatey or super-wealthy. And for the great majority of them it’s an empty dream, founded on nothing but this GOP-encouraged culture of luck.

  4. Sonny Nardone says:

    Thanks for the great article. Now I know…

    • Ilyas says:

      well for one hes an actor, so his personal befleis have nothing to do with his acting in this case, and two i Third Rock Fron the Sun was great but it is possible for people to overcome some of their past roles, a good example of this is of course Will Smith.and if this is the RISE of cobra then you may not see the fully costumed cobra in this movie, but in the sequel if it gets one.

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